Dr. Laura Berman
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Falling into a pit of depression after a break-up...
Dr. Berman - I am 17 and in May of 2018 a boy and I went all the way. I loved him and I thought he loved me, but he left without a word after. This caused me to fall into a pit of depression and self-harm like one I had been in before I met him. I avoided a lot of my friends and even family. In early September at school, a complete stranger walked up to me and hugged me. This made all my bottled-up emotions come out and I just cried as he held me close.
Discovering he's a slob... Can you live with him?
Dr. Berman- I met a guy and we had gone out about 8 times before I had gone to his place. He always picked me up and dropped me off and I thought it was so great. I was curious where he lived though and so I told him I wanted to go to his place over the weekend. OMG. He is just a pig.
He avoids confrontation... Red Flag?
Dr Berman- Whenever I get upset at my boyfriend because of anything (major or minor) he disappears to avoid the confrontation. I came from a knock down drag out family where we hatch it out. His family has never raised a voice at one another.. And they are all visibly unhappy.
Childhhood Trauma Coming Up In Your Adult Life
Hi Dr. Berman, I'm dealing with a lot of childhood trauma and would like to ask which I should work on first, how long I should expect the process to take until I feel healthy to date again and what type of therapist I should look for.
Off based opinions...
Dr Berman- I have a friend who married and then divorced young. Since then she has been navigating the dating world like me. We wallow in our misery together sometimes and that is always comforting but-here is where things get weird. If she starts dating someone and happy - I am always so supportive of her.
Attracted to a scent?
Dr Berman- I met a great guy out at a park. We had coffee. Talked for hours. We exchanged #s and talked on the phone all week. He is really amazing and I am really into him. BUT- we went on a date last night and at the end of the night when we went to kiss, I felt a little sick to my stomach. Like there was something about his smell- that totally turned me off.
Opposites Attract?
Dr Berman- I know a man that is just the complete opposite of me. He says up I say down. We don't agree on anything. Our politics are on opposing sides. He hates cats. I have 2. Everything points to a disaster relationship and yet..We can't keep our hands off of each other.
Stay single or date?
I have been safely single, reached middle age, felt drawn to a relationship but struggled to connect. SO my question is- is it better to become a committed bachelor or persist in the relationship unknowns?
Office Gossip... Good Idea?
Dr Berman- I have been at my job for the past 20 years. I a great at what I do and have always been considered one of the lead sales guys at my company and moreso in my field. 1 year ago a new person came onto the team. She is 25 and fresh in the business. She managed to close a few really big deals but I'd say it was more beginners luck than real savy.
Showing no self-control
Dr Berman- I know my boyfriend loves me and is faithful to me but there is something that he does that just drives me absolutely bonkers... He cannot avoid checking women out. It is constant. It's like a dog and a squirrel. It sort of bothered me in the beginning but I never said anything.
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